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This is almost funny enough to really happen!
EA
Dear Diary,
Monday:
Now home from honeymoon and settled in our new home, it's fun to
cook for Bob.  Today I made an angel food  cake and the recipe said,
"Beat
12 eggs separately. " Well, I didn't have enough bowls to do that, so I
had
to borrow enough bowls to beat the eggs in. The cake turned out  fine.
Tuesday:
We wanted a fruit salad for supper.  The recipe said,   "Serve without
dressing."  So I didn't dress. But, Bob happened to bring a friend home
for
supper that night.  Did they ever look startled when I served the salad.
Wednesday:
I decided to serve rice and found a recipe which said, "Wash thoroughly
before steaming the rice."  So I heated some water and took a bath
before steaming  the rice.  Sounded kinda silly in the middle of the
week. I
can't say it improved  the rice any.
Thursday:
Today Bob asked for salad again.  I tried a new recipe. It said,
"Prepare ingredients, then toss on a bed of lettuce one hour before
serving."  I hunted all over the garden by my mom's.  So I tossed my
salad into the  bed of lettuce and stood over there one hour so the dog
would not take it.  Bob came over and asked if I felt all right.
I wonder why?
Friday:
Today I found an easy recipe for cookies.  It said,  "Put all
ingredients in a bowl and beat it."  Beat it I did, right over to my
mom's house. There must have been something wrong with the recipe,
because
when I came back home again it looked the  same as when I left it.
Saturday:
Bob went shopping today and brought home a chicken. He asked me
to dress it for Sunday.  I'm sure I don't know how hens dress for
Sunday. I never noticed back on the farm, but I found a doll dress and
some little shoes.  I thought the hen looked real cute. When Bob saw it,
I
wondered why he counted to 10.
Sunday:
Today Bob's folks came to dinner. I wanted to serve roast, but all
we had in the icebox, was hamburger. So I put it in the oven and set the
controls for roast. Must be something wrong with the oven, because it
still
came out  hamburger.
Good night, Dear Diary.  This has been an exciting week. I am eager for
tomorrow to come, so I can try a new recipe on Bob.
If we can get a bigger oven I would like to try and surprise him
with -----------------
" Chocolate Moose "